In the Beginning

It makes sense to start our adoption story at the beginning, but what is the beginning? Is the beginning when I poured over my mom's Ladies Home Journal when I was a little kid, enthralled with an article about a little girl adopted from China? Or is our beginning when on our second date Doug shared with me that he is adopted? I don't subscribed to the idea that our beginning involves a doctor's office. Only God knows the beginning to our story. So I shall attempt to begin at the starting line of action.

Between 2002 and 2005, I did tons of research about adoption, both domestic and international. I requested enough information packets from agencies to wallpaper a 2000 sq-ft house. And then I would vomit info onto Doug in warp speed speech. And then I'd repeat the process again. :) Heaven forbid we went near the mall because then I would march into the bookstore and spend a ridiculous amount of time trying to find any and all adoption books available. Unfortunately, finding an adoption book amongst the tons of maternity books is a bit like finding a needle in a haystack and just as frustrating. Then poor Doug would have to hear that rant all the way back home. You can see the buds of advocacy blooming here.

In the fall of 2004, I believe it was October, Doug and I decided to officially pursue an adoption plan. The timing was influenced by the fact that I was in my second to last semester of grad school. With the end in sight, it felt like it might finally be time to "stop living in pause" (Copyright me). We met with a lawyer, who was a family friend, and discussed a private, non-agency domestic adoption. The name of the game in that area is networking. And I thought, dude, we know lots of people. No worries. Except that by March 2005 I had had enough of waiting with no steps, no hoops to jump through. And having turned 25 in January 2005, I was now old enough to adopt internationally (25 was the minimum age at the time for all countries except China); I turned all my attention to international at this time. China would have been our first choice, but the age limit made it impossible. Our next thought was South Korea, but there is a law (?) that couples in MS cannot adopt a healthy Korean infant (special needs only). As first time parents, we could not handle that route. It didn't take much longer before I zeroed in on Guatemala, and Doug was on board once I told him (a) it was a 4-hour flight, (b) it was only one trip, and (c) it was only a 5-day trip. Sounds silly, but the traveling part of international adoption was a great source of fear for Doug. And remains to this day.

In May 2005, I graduated with my master's degree, but more importantly, we filled out our first official piece of international adoption paperwork. And we were off!